10/11/22

I've just got back to England. As I set down my bags I realise I have no memory of the journey other than feeling like I've been in Istanbul. I ask people if I brought all my belongings back with me, and if I gave my landlord my key. I spend a very long time trying to remember how I got from Tbilisi to [redacted] and eventually wake up.

07/10/22

I'm in a street with lots of people running and screaming. I look up and see King Kong standing on the roof of a five-storey building, but he's only about 10 foot tall. He's throwing things at the ground but I feel it's too ridiculous and decide I must be dreaming. I tell a lady next to me not to be afraid because it's only a dream. The ground is littered with colourful and interesting objects, none of which I committed to memory.

13/09/22

I'm at a fast food restaurant in America and I come up with a joke to tell the cashier. I say "Everything is so much bigger in America. In England, we just call it One Guy."

31/08/22

I'm laying on the floor laughing and telling a woman about a hilarious name I've come up with. Between gasps for air I say to her, "Reiner Ceros"

30/08/22

On a plane which is crashing. The mood of the passengers is concern rather than panic. I consider the situation and think "If this was a dream, I'd have woken up by now. I guess I'm going to die." I try to stay as calm as possible in preparation for death, but the plane crash lands in a river and goes into a spin after the left wing breaks off. We come to a stop outside my Catholic church.

31/07/22

Cycling through a dockyard with a friend and my bike chain breaks. Luckily, we stop right outside the immigration office which is where we need to be. I go inside alone and Priti Patel is standing there with a cat o' nine tails. She proceeds to whip me a few times and it stings.

22/07/22

Went pretty lucid last night. Was at a Georgian restaurant with my mum and stepdad. They were congratulating me for my [redacted] work and then my stepdad starts speaking to the waiter in spanish so I threaten to stab him in the eye. Just as I pick up my fork, I realise they divorced over 10 years ago. I look at my fingers and they look really vibrant and detailed.